Sex or Money Easier to Talk About ?
It's safe to say that almost everyone has unresolved money issues and they show up big-time in our couple relationships. Why? We don't talk about money because it pushes our buttons – the very buttons our parents installed but that are often under our conscious radar.
As Deborah Price, author of The Heart of Money (excellent book) says, "...women respond to money with fear, and men with anger." When my husband and I would try to talk about money, I'd dissolve into tears. Nothing got resolved.
According to Deborah Price, couples tend to have one of three patterns they operate from. The traditional pattern is the most common where the husband takes the lead in financial decision making. Many working women still don't feel knowledgeable enough about money to ask for equal say. It's important to remember that women have only been in the workforce in larger numbers since the 70s so we're playing catch-up in terms of making and handling money.
The other two patterns are contemporary where the couple make joint decisions and autonomous where each make their own money decisions separately and do not combine finances.
To understand a bit about your own couples money patterns ask yourself these questions:
- How did your parents handle money? Were they open or secretive?
- Did you grow up feeling money was abundant or scarce?
- Was money a frequent source of conflict between your parents?
Be gentle with the information that comes from these questions and continue to educate yourself about your relationship with money. Our unexplored and unresolved money issues can block our prosperity, financial well-being and happy relationships. Free Financial Tips to Financial Health & Happiness